There are many life losses that I go through related to this disease that need grieving. There is the loss of time spent mired in    disease rather than health and happiness. There is the loss of self respect, dignity and inner contentment that the disease of addiction engenders. There may the loss of my substance, my dysfunctional or acting out behaviors. The more I learn and grow; the greater the distance between myself and those still mired in the disease may become. I may lose certain relationships or parts of them as I move along my path of recovery. I may need to grieve the family that fell apart, the parts of myself that didn’t get a chance to develop or the family members I love but cannot be as close with as I may wish. All of these losses are real and need to be grieved so that I can move through them, learn, grow and embrace the life that is now becoming more real and more my own a day at a time.

I see that grief gives me back pieces of myself

“Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose. There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.” 
Dr. Elizabeth Kebler-Ross