Today I understand that when I project my feelings outward and see them as belonging to other people and not to me, I postpone my own self-awareness. The only way I can deal with difficult feelings is first to claim them as my own. Sitting with anxiety, anger, rage and jealousy is not pleasant, but actually experiencing my own feelings is the only way to get through them.

I own my feelings and am willing to experience them.

One afternoon, when veteran American League baseball umpire Bill Guthrie was working behind the plate, the catcher for the visiting team repeatedly protested his calls. Guthrie endured this for three innings. In the fourth inning, Guthrie stopped him. “Son,” he said gently. “You’ve been a big help to me in calling the balls and strikes and I appreciate it. But I think I’ve got the hang of it now. So I’m going to ask you to go to the clubhouse and show whoever’s there how to take a shower.”