Today I recognize that it is actually possible to talk things over. To be direct and honest with a person with the intention of working out a problem seems difficult and risky. I still feel that my honest feelings will be met with hostility and that somehow I will end up creating a mess. I experienced this as powerlessness when I was young and I felt unable to do anything to change my situation. Today I know a new kind of powerlessness. It comes from a mature understanding that I cannot control another person. I can only keep my side clean and honest. There is no need for me to be blamed nor do I need to blame the other person.
If I enter the dialogue willing to be honest and open-minded, refraining from insults and criticism, chances are pretty good that something will get resolved.

I am able to talk things over.

Speech is a mirror of the soul: as a man speaks, so is he.
Publilius Syrus